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NTM 1 du 19 july 1998 (afternoon edition)
By Jupp, WAR IN Lizbekistan RAGES ON: DAY THREE
19 July 1998
OUTER LIZBEKISTAN--
General Bard's forces have broken through the VIRTUAL FENCE OF EMBARRASSMENT and decoded the SECRET GARDEN GAME, long a TREASURE
of Lizbekistan and Princess Liz, forcing open a PAIR OF LIPS  and urging Lizbeks to RISE UP like the NASDAQ 
Sun Jul 19 7:48am ET - U.S. Markets Closed.
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+9.78 (+0.10%) |
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and toss
EMBARRASSMENT ITSELF on the Minister of that very department.
Casualties were in the teens, particularly two teens who patrol the
PRETZEL FACTORY  (Beanie and Meanie)  and a lone six year old SIMON, designer of Lizbekistan's lone airliner.
General Bard, casually dressed in what he calls his "Hamlet Suit," was seen tossing skulls into the widening pit of humiliation since the WAR ON LIZBEKISTAN began on Wednesday. "Alas Poor Rose  , I hardly knew ya," he was quoted as saying, as he brayed aloud and quaffed a case of WIDE MOUTH RHEINGOLDS  , booty from his opening GAMBIT.
Lizbek Forces have surrounded the Vogue Ultra THIN Lights (Menthol) 
FACTORY, to keep the Bard's Advancing Units away, although early morning
reports have show a BREECH of SECURITY in the VIRTUAL SPACE.
"We may or may no longer be VIRGINS,"
(see the controversy surrounding the two American teenagers supposedly planning to lose their virginity on the Net reached Thailand on Friday -
http://www.ourfirsttime.com/
(we went there and found this message)
IEG is no longer hosting the web address www.ourfirsttime.com.
Click here for more info on why or
Click below for the hottest adult site around. )
said the PRINCESS in an address to the Nation. "I'll have to get a new pair of shoes for this!"
CHINE LANZMANN  (chine@cplus.fr) was dispatched to DISNEYWORLD to seek reinforcements, financial aid and "some Cheese Doodles," from Mickey & Friends, offering in return 100 SHARES OF YAHOO  and Tickets to GLION  ,
SWITZERLAND where Hostess X-tine
(INTERNET:CHRISTINE.ROSSETTI@01.CHLSNR.NESTRD.CH) and FRIEND OF LIZBKEISTAN has promised the Tour Group a SHOW OF COWS with their Bells On.
IBM.NET  troops were seen in the vicity of GLION, otherwise a sleepy town
of VACHES and "some old people who still make cheese with the holes in
them," drinking squirts of hot milk on an even hotter summer day.
For More WAR News and PICTURES from the FRONT: www.lizbekistan.com
(SEE: GALASNOST)
To be continued......
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