A letter from Gabriel Tate Edwards Spencer
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.	.	.	.	.	.	.	.	.	.	Subject: Missive personnelle a son Altesse To -- Son Altesse Royale Liz From -- Gabriel Tate Edwards Spencer, Fetikitsch Your honour, No doubt have you heard my name before. Believe me, I know what people think of me, and I am not trying to ask for a pardon for what I have done. Please read on. As you must have heard, I was illegally living in Lizbekistan for over four months. Being a Melbournite expatriot, I naively thought I could live a happy, anonymous cocktail-driven life thanks to the well-known (and now fixed) security flaws in your administrative system. This came to an end earlier than expected, and before even imagining what I could be accused of, I was walking down Avenue Mozart with my only luggage: a red PCMCIA card containing nothing less than the message Sir S.T. gave me before my arrival. The message - which has still never been read - was of extreme importance for Lizbekistan. I was to deliver it to Son Altesse, without anyone being seen nor caught. Of course, I only remembered the object of my stay after I was thrown out. Being generally stupid, I didn't think to ask for a Espion-en-Residence certificate. I didn't really accomplish much during my visit, except for a few cocktails for some extremely important-looking ministers, who promised they'd remember me. [In case your ministers have erased their memories concerning me and my shaker, I have photographies of them enjoying my Ramos Fizz.] In case you're worried about what happened, Sir S.T. fell down a hole in his room's floor, leading directly to his basement, and, actually, is still there. But this does not end my mission. I guess you have understood the nature of my message. I am ready to hand over the Red Card (in Lizbekistan's secret Contre-espionnage history, I heard that my intrusion and all the disagreements I caused are known as the 'Red Card Files'). I have tried speaking to various ministers, without giving away the secrets I'm holding, but they all thought I was looking for a way to get back into Lizbekistan paradise, with a new title. This is not true. I'm just trying to give back what I owe. Please let me know by using this ultrasecret mail follower: fetikitsch@kosher.com Gabriel Tate Edwards Spencer www.nirvanet.com/feti-kitsch	.
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I was illegally living in Lizbekistan for over four months. I naively thought I could live a happy, anonymous cocktail-driven life thanks to the well-known (and now fixed) security flaws in your administrative system.
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